I will never forget the heartbreaking moment telling my kids about the divorce. There were tears, hugs, and questions. But what I remember most was the truly profound understanding and love from my kids for me and their dad.
They accepted our decision and respected it and somehow knew that everything was going to be ok. Even if the life as they knew it was changing forever.
Today I look at my beautiful kids and I see strength, love, kindness and compassionate in each of them. The past few years have taught them the power of resilience, how to lean into one another and to be supportive and loving to to each other but also to others going through difficult moments in their lives too.
Their bond with each other has become infallible. They look out for one another now in a way different than before. This weekend with my brother and his family, my sister in law commented - “they are so bonded, so close, so protective of each other and of you. You can feel the connection and that inner calm acceptance and love.”
That is their inner strength and love for each other that has emerged from the hard change. These are the gifts that difficult moments give- courage, understanding and appreciation.
Divorce is something many families endure. But they survive it.
It’s always hard and is an unwanted change, especially for kids.
But when we rise strong, we show our kids they can rise too, and even grow. They can learn and adapt.
And even come to realize that this new family is still a beautiful family. That love is love. Even when it comes from 2 houses.
They know that what makes a family a family is love, respect, trust, safety and supporting each other.
That is our family, even after divorce.
Maybe especially after divorce.
Our kids are our biggest hope, our legacy, our future, our life’s work.
We can’t protect them from everything, but we can teach them courage and resilience to manage life’s challenges and changes.
It’s just that now the love comes from 2 houses rather than one.
No one wants divorce for their kids. It’s one of the biggest reasons broken marriages continue on for so long. to protect our kids.
But maybe there is a silver lining for kids here too, if we look to find it.